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  • Writer's pictureMichael Scarn

Week 5 Review and Week 6 Preview

What in the actual hell, Kansas City? Why didn't sign Will Fuller V or Odell Beckham Jr. or Cole Beasley? You just HAD to go and play Marquez Valdes-Scantling and Mecole Hardman. Continuing on, Jerick McKinnon deserves the ball less than Isaiah Pacheco, Clyde Edwards-Helaire, Noah Gray, Jody Fortson, and even Chad Henne. Chiefs... you ruined the plan. Now I have to take more risks...

Why is Nick Folk producing more points than the quarterbacks that Reagan starts?

Week 5 Review

Zack defeats Tom to remain perfect in 198.90-133.30 stomping

Zack won his 22nd consecutive matchup with a dominant victory over Tom, cruising to a 60-point win. For some reason, Travis Kelce had a four-touchdown night on Monday. Adding that performance to Justin Jefferson's 24 points and Derrick Henry's 26 points, Tom couldn't overtake our reigning champion. However, Davante Adams and Nick Chubb both scored over 25, but Lamar Jackson grossly underperformed for the fighting Toms.

Zach come up short of projections, uses Monday night to defeat Bettis, 111.60-75.45

Zach's Monday night crew came through as Patrick Mahomes put up 40 points and Daniel Carlson netted 16 points at the kicker spot. A couple of Bettis' players showed up in Jalen Hurts, Ken Walker III, and Chris Olave for nearly 75% of his total week score. Unfortunately, Olave may be hurt and fortunately, Walker steps in for an injured Rashaad Penny for the rest of the over-performing Seahawks season.

David's lucky ass knocks off John by 100 for his fourth straight win

Awesome weeks from QB1 Josh Allen, Christian McCaffrey, Leonard Fournette, and (finally) Mike Williams. Combined, they scored 70% of David's 163.80 points. After losing his quarterback, John had to fish around for another, snagging Justin Fields from Reagan. Fields did outscore his projection, but John's third-highest scorer of the week was Irv Smith Jr. scoring 6.20 points. Not good.

Corey also uses MNF to come back, handing Zeke his fourth consecutive loss, 153.15-144.10

Another matchup that Monday night's game flipped the script on as Corey wins by eight. Zeke used Gabe Davis' three-catch, 170-yard, two touchdown game and Jeff Wilson's 18 points to make Corey sweat. Trusting his guys, Corey saw Josh Jacobs run for over 150 yards and score. Cooper Kupp and Dalvin Cook also joined in on the 20+ points fun.

Reagan overcomes multiple busts and beats on Jordan, 137.7-78.0

Breece Hall is here to stay, folks. With 26.7 points, Breece was joined by a 33.9 score from Austin Ekeler, Stefon Diggs' 20.2 points, and Mark Andrews' 18.9 points. Reagan felt really good about this matchup because Jordan scored 75% of his points through his M.I.L.F. hunter (Zach Wilson), his G.O.A.T. kicker (Justin Tucker), and two barrel-bottomers (Olamide Zaccheaus and Khalil Shakir).

In the biggest upset of the year, Bryce uses three Kansas City role players to break hearts and sh*t on dreams, coming back to beat Heery in 93.25-90.00 duel

Nick Folk scored 18 points against the Lions and three Chiefs over-performed. Good thing Marquise Brown is loving Arizona and I sat George Pickens, who looks awesome. Just an absolute stomach-sinker. I have no words but the fact that I have secured all of the available scoring quarterbacks off waivers to hinder Bryce's point-scoring for this week.


Week 6 Preview

Our Game of the Week in Week 6 is Corey (4-1, fourth) vs. Zach (4-1, second). Projected less than ten points apart, this matchup can be the difference between upper echelon and dropping to the edge of playoff birth. Granted, this is only Week 6, but what a fun thing we got going on in Threat Level: Midnight. The key to this matchup is can Jonathan Taylor play and play well vs. the up-and-coming Jaguars?

Next up, our scoring leader, reigning champion, and leaderboard-topper, Zack (5-0, first) faces Heery (2-3, seventh). This game may put playoffs on the back burner for Heery. A 60-point win guarantee came out of a press-release from Zack's camp on Tuesday morning. Hopefully, Heery sends out his best.

David (4-1, third) matches up against Bettis (1-4, ninth).

Reagan (3-2, fifth) looks to mash on Bryce (1-4, last).

Tom (3-2, sixth) should beat Jordan (1-4, eleventh).

Finally, Zeke (1-4, eighth) will take on John (1-4, tenth) to round out the week.


Weekly Pick 'Em

Heery (Last Week: 5-1, Overall: 25-5)

Zack, Corey, David, Reagan, Tom, Zeke

Reagan (Last Week: 4-2, Overall: 22-8)

Zack, Zach, David, Reagan, Tom, Zeke

Zack (Last Week: 4-2, Overall: 21-9)

Zack, Zach, David, Reagan, Tom, John

NEXT WEEK: Wirst Take!

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